25 seconds into the teaser we found out that John Rambo has been living (surprise!) the life of a recluse somewhere in Southeast Asia. Maybe all the killing and slaughtering has mellowed him down. Maybe all he wants now is some peace and quiet, living on a boat and catching fish with his trusty bow and arrow.
Bow and arrow??? Maybe it's really difficult to get fishing rods and nets in those parts. Now you wonder if he still keeps his machine guns and limitless rounds of ammunition.
Apparently there's this group of good do-ers that wants John to ferry them up to Burma to do some Christian-y missionary stuff for the people. John refuses, and tells them it's a warzone - it's just too dangerous for them to go.
Woah, some soldier with a flame-thrower. Guess military technologies hasn't really much improve within the last 20 years for those Asian radicals. They could just put in scenes from Rambo II and I wouldn't be able to tell the difference.As all plot devices require this bunch of dumbasses persisted to go on their own. Expectedly they are all soon captured by the local militia which gives them a hard lesson on the consequences of trespassing.
Soon after an US army officer comes instead of Colonel Trautman (the actor Richard Crenna died of cancer in 2003) and tells John about the plight of the missionaries. He proceeds to persuade him by quoting some scriptures about 'being an instrument of peace' and 'it is by dying that you will find eternal life.'
It's a whole bunch of bullshit but Rambo buys it anyway, giving him an excuse to go on another killing spree. Now this is where the fun starts.
Ok, Rambo doing his usual sneak-up-and-kill routine again.
He punched the guy's head off?!?! Oh, he decapitated the guy using his bowie knife. That's a new trick right there. But what's next really got me speechless.
He fired a GPMG at someone's face at point-blank range. Now even Don Corleone's embalmer will find it hard to patch that guy up.Next he tries to stop a minion from raping the female lead. He grabs the guy's head and neck, and I'm awaiting the classic snap-the-neck-like-its-made-of-toothpick maneuver.
HE FUCKING RIPS THE GUY'S NECK OUT?!?!?!?! Looks like John's having his PMS moment.We are then treated to a general dose of explosions, Rambo taking out dozens of minions, more explosions and Rambo taking out dozens more. Standard fare.
Ah, another nostalgic scene - you would have bet he'd bring his trusty bow and explosive arrows along.Check out the teaser trailer here. You've been warned.